Thursday 10 February 2011

NEW FILMS

MOVIE BASED ON A SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE SKETCH WELL-LOVED STATESIDE BUT UTTERLY UNKNOWN OVER HERE, THEREBY HAVING ALL THE APPEAL OF A PRODUCTION OF "THE WINSLOW BOY" BEING SCREENED FOR A TRIBE OF MASSAI WARRIORS (15)
12.00, 2.00, 4.00, 8.00, 10.30

DESPERATE ADAPTATION OF MINOR COMIC BOOK HERO IN THE HOPE IT WILL GO THE SAME WAY AS THE BATMAN AND SPIDERMAN FRANCHISES, RATHER THAN FAILING DISMALLY LIKE THE HULK AND THE SHADOW (PG)
12.00, 2.00, 4.00, 8.00, 10.00

SERIOUS GEORGE CLOONEY FILM WHERE HE PUTS SOME WEIGHT ON AND DECLINES TO DO HIS CHARMING SCHTICK IN ORDER TO REMIND THE WORLD THAT HE IS AN ACTOR AND NOT JUST A STAR (15)
10.00, 12.00, 2.00, 4.00, 8.00, 10.30

LAST DITCH ATTEMPT AT WRINGING MORE MOOLAH OUT OF THE HARRY POTTER FRANCHISE BEFORE EVERYBODY'S FORGOTTEN EVERYTHING ABOUT IT, WHICH THEY WILL HAVE DONE IN ABOUT 1.6 YEARS, WHEN J.K.ROWLING HAS TO AUCTION HER PERSONAL BELONGINGS (U)
10.00, 12.00, 2.00, 4.00, 8.00

EMPOWERING THING FOR WOMEN (ALL ABOUT SISTERHOOD OR FOOD OR SOMETHING) YOUR GIRLFRIEND DRAGS YOU TO SEE (15)
12.00, 2.00, 4.00, 8.00, 10.30, 12.00

ANOTHER IN THE MIKE LEIGH CANON IN WHICH ACTORS SEEM TO BE PRESENTING WHAT THEY IMAGINE THE DIRECTOR WANTS OF THEM, I.E. AN INCREASINGLY-GROTESQUE PARODY OF WHAT, MANY YEARS AGO, ROUND ABOUT THE TIME OF "NUTS IN MAY", WAS QUITE FRESH AND HONEST (15)
2.00, 4.00, 8.00, 10.30

ANOTHER FAILED, HORRENDOUS JACK BLACK VEHICLE TO FURTHER WILT THE GARLANDS HE WON FOR HIMSELF WITH "SCHOOL OF ROCK" (15)
12.00, 2.00, 4.00, 8.00, 10.30

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